2020-06-17

Canada is back!

In the same way that years ago President Monkey managed to alienate existing allies even as he preached about his international savvy, the Shiny Pony not only failed to get Canada a worthless UN Security Council seat but in fact got fewer votes than the Right Honourable Stephen Harper (pbuh) did when he attempted to secure us a seat a decade back.

For those keeping score, Canada has been throwing millions of dollars of tax money since 2017 in an attempt to obtain this coveted (?) international prize. A year ago CBC reported over a million had already been spent solely on the schmoozing, not counting the millions wasted on ineffective UN agencies and NGOs that make us sound caring even as middle aged women in Winnipeg holding down two jobs are (metaphorically) beaten and robbed to pay for it all. Back in February Spencer Fernando reported Trudeau had wasted another $10M alone. The funny thing about trying to keep the score is that we can't even keep up. For one thing, the Shiny Pony's government isn't releasing any recent spending numbers.

You might think this is an exaggeration and it is, but as I wrote last month it's a very small one: this woman would be shot and killed for noncompliance:

  1. I don't pay my taxes
  2. The government says I have to, and sends me a bill
  3. I ignore the bill, but take all my money out of electronic means and keep it in my house
  4. The government sends a bill collector to my house
  5. I refuse to let the bill collector in
  6. The bill collector comes with police officers with guns
  7. I still refuse to let the bill collector in
  8. The cops break down my door and if I try to stop them, they pull out their guns and shoot me
And what, pray tell, are we to do with the seat once we get it? Even CBC was forced to admit that Rat Bastard 2.0 didn't have an actual strategy to put forward about why we wanted the seat and what we expected to accomplish with it.
"We've not yet seen any articulated vision of why we actually want to get the seat," David Perry, a vice-president at the Canadian Global Affairs Institute, said.

He pointed out that having a clear objective the government could point to — like a better engagement strategy for Asia — would paint a more transparent picture for Canadians and UN members.

Perry added that it's not a matter of throwing money at the campaign: The visibility of the prime minister and foreign affairs minister can be just as valuable as a dollar figure.

"It's tough simply because we haven't articulated a view of why they should vote for us."


Blanchard rejected the idea that Canada hasn't been clear with its objectives. He raised five points that Canada's security council tenure would focus on: Sustaining peace, promoting women, climate change, economic security and promoting multilateralism.

Canada has used past Security Council positions to fight apartheid in South Africa and limit the trade of blood diamonds.
Even for a Frog Blanchard is a retard. Perry was talking about a clear objective and instead we blather about chicks cars and the third world war in the most open-ended and generic of terms. By contrast, when the Right Honourable Stephen Harper (pbuh) applied for the seat he in fact cut our international expenditures. He wasn't interested in obtaining the seat through bribery (unsurprisingly, the Liberal Party of Canada immediately tried bribery) but through principled dedication to a specific set of causes. He wasn't willing to sell out Israel or our energy sector just to schmooze at the United Nations. The Right Honourable Stephen Harper (pbuh) articulated his vision (unsurprisingly, the boring policy wonk tried campaigning on policies) and while he was definitely interested in the seat and lobbied for it, it was clear that he wasn't going to sacrifice the foreign policy goals of his government just to get it.

In fairness the Little Potato didn't sacrifice any foreign policy goals either, but that's more because he doesn't have any. Instead he just wasted millions that will go to corrupt warlords and more corrupt UN goons. All of that for fewer votes than Canada received in 2010. It turns out that shameless bribery doesn't produce results as good as old fashioned rectitude and outspokenness. Yes Canada failed to secure a seat in 2010 which was certainly a blow to the national ego, but if you lose while standing up for what's right it sure feels better than losing while bending over every way and bankrupting the treasury in a series of futile gestures. Let's not forget, of course, that Red China is the reason we didn't get that 2010 seat: we weren't compliant to them back in those days.

Contrast with now.