2006-12-01

It hasn't been 5 long years, but I hate them just the same

(This was posted December 2 at 3:33am)

Tonight I found myself thinking about the Liberal Leadership Convention. I've done a small post about it already, but that was it.

I think it was when Colin James songs started being played on Mix 96, but regardless, I ended up thinking a bit more about it. Ignatieff looks vaguely like John Kerry, while Gerald Kennedy looks suspiciously similar to Jerry Springer. At the very least, political cartoonish and conservative bloggers should have a field day (yours truely included).

Hey, quick quiz...

Q. Why was Howard Dean chosen as the keynote speaker at the Liberal Leadership Convention?
A. Somebody had to give Michael Ignatieff a ride home.

So anyways, I ended up at one point thinking, as I said earlier, about Colin James as the musical guest. And something struck me as odd. At first I couldn't put my finger on it, and then it hit me.

One of my favourite Colin James songs (besides the one in the post title, which has a more personal meaning for me) is "Chicks, Cars, (And the Third World War)". Not having enough energy or knowledge to do a Mark Steyn-style Song of the Week segment, I did think that the artist who penned this tune has no business being involved in the Liberal Leadership Convention.

Why? Well, what, if you can't glean from the title, are the only three things worth living/dying for?
  1. Chicks
  2. Cars
  3. The Third World War
The problem is that the federal Liberals are the last place you would ever think to hear this song. Let's look at this item by item.
  1. Chicks:
    The party of Belinda Stronach and Heidi Fry will tear you apart if you dare ever refer to broads in this fashion. The Liberal Party is the party of feminism, and unless you're fighting for these "chicks" to have free mid-birth abortions, make up precisely 50% of Parliament, or "sex-workers rights" [no, really! check this link -ed], the Liberal Party is no place for you.
  2. Cars:
    You're kidding, right? Thanks to the Liberals foolishly signing onto the Kyoto Agreement, the last thing the Liberal Party of Canada is willing to fight for is your automobiles. In fact, "If Canada were to remove every plane, train and automobile from service and were to shut down every manufacturing plant in the country, we would still not meet our Kyoto target, according to GHG figures available on Environment Canada's website." Of course, the Liberals were quick to fight for Ontario's auto-manufacturing sector, but the cars themselves are in danger of being run off the road if the Liberals and their NDP allies have their way.,
  3. The Third World War:
    Unknown what the Liberals will do about the Third World War, but it probably isn't good news. For example, Liberals now don't think that Afghanistan is worth dying for (as evidenced by their opposition to military deaths in that country). We know that the Liberals aren't too keen on protecting Israel (and by the way, check out this great YouTube video about the Jews courtesy of The Black Kettle). We know they weren't interested in Iraq, weren't particularly interested in taking care of North Korea, and have been soft on Chinese Communists. In short, the Liberals aren't willing to live, or die, for the Third World War. In any form it arrives in, the Liberals will chicken out.
Well get out of my way, I'm a leaving this town
I said get out of my way, there's something bad coming down
I feel danger, trouble all around



So what is the current state of results of the Liberal Leadership Convention? Jim Dinning er, Michael Ignatieff has come first place on the first ballot, but not high enough to win, garnishing a disappointing 29% for the man many thought would win on the first go-round. (Any wonder I compared him to Dinning?)

Globe & Mail reports that Ignatieff's speech has left many cold. Meanwhile, here are the results:
  1. Ignatieff, 1412, 29.3%
  2. Rae, 977, 20.3%
  3. Dion, 856, 17.8%
  4. Kennedy, 854, 17.7%
  5. Dryden, 238, 4.9%
  6. Queer-As-Folk, 192, 4%
  7. Volpe, 156, 3.2%
  8. Hall-Findlay, 130, 2.7%

All I can say is best of luck to Scott Brison. Let's shut the Liberals out of the entire prairies!