Perhaps you've heard about Columbia University's recent "extra graduations" nonsense. It's all okay though because "white privilege" yadda yadda yadda.
You are part of the problem.
— Riki Jones (@RikiJones3) March 16, 2021
The main (big) ceremony is the white one.
If you want white pride celebrations join the kkk.
Okay, if what Riki claims is true then why won't/shouldn't Columbia University go full out? If they already have separate graduations for niggers and sodomites, why not rename the "main" one the "white graduation"? It can also be "voluntary" and "open to all students", but officially name it the white one. The rationale is exactly the same as it is for the "separate but equal" side-ceremonies.
After all, you don't need to be "the kkk" to celebrate that white culture is terrific and the world was built on the achievements of hardworking white people. There's no reason whites shouldn't be proud of the modern world we built, and Riki knows full well she can't argue the point. The point of a graduation ceremony is to celebrate intellect, achievement, and dedication in pursuit of a rigorous standard of excellence: we've easily checked off all those boxes, as the graphic at the top of this post can attest.
Bonus segregated graduation: If this sounds familiar, it's because we've made fun of this concept once before.
Update 1:49pm: Kurn responds via text message, reminding me that according to woke intersectionality adherents, the main graduation ceremony should be the white one because it celebrates things that they acknowledge only white people have: intellect and being correct.