Almost as much hysterics as Voyager's captain

When you do a Bing search for Star Trek Voyager the preview is this word salad...

I challenge anybody to explain what half of this means.

In the 24th Century the Federation star ship USS Voyager has just been released for take-off and for a Deep-Space mission to the Badlands. The Badlands is the hideout for so-called traitors to the Federation. They call themselves the Maquis. The Maquis are mostly ex-Federation and some freelancers. Anyone who pays their barging? is their leader. Captain Kathryn Janeway is the chosen captain for this mission because of her training and experience. She requests to speak a prisoner and former Maquis helmsman called Tom Paris. (Tomas Eugene Paris) Because of Mr. Paris, his experience and knowledge of the Badlands, he is the perfect advisor to go on the Deep-Space mission. Mr. Paris is also the Son of the Commander-Admiral Paris, Head of Starfleet. Setting off for the Badlands, they find no Maquis ship what so ever. Not even a trace. Some while later, they get swept away off their 'feet' and are carried to the Delta Quadrant - 75,000 light-years from home. There they find a stating? which belongs to the Caretaker who lately takes care of an entire race called the Ocampa. A friendly-suspicious person called Neelix is hailing them and warning them to stay away from his junk. She makes a deal with Neelix and he can come on board. If it isn't for Neelix, they couldn't save the abducted Maquis and Starfleet Operations Manager Harry Kim from the Ocampa world. This world is threatened by a race called the Kazon. Through the Caretaker, they meet the Maquis and decide to become allies because the situation doesn't look promising. They eventually will get at war with the Kazon since they want to have the - already dying - Caretaker's station and destroy the Ocampa. Captain Chakotay rescues Voyager from destruction by the Kazon and destroys his ship in the process, by colliding it with the Kazon ship. They will form one single crew and rescue the missing B'Lanna Torres and Harry Kim. Kes, Neelix's girlfriend and Nelix himself will stay on board and serve the captain by becoming part of the crew. Maquis and Starfleet bond together, they set off on a 75 year journey to the Alpha Quadrant, where Earth is. Since some of the crew

The month dilemma

We're about to run into a problem.

As you know, on a lot of forms we tend to abbreviate months. It's easier to type and view, but especially in the computer era we like having narrow columns on spreadsheets. You can see in the example below that to abbreviate the months drops your space requirement by 47%:



The summer months cause a bit of a wrinkle though. May, for example, gets off easy: it's already only 3 letters long. What tends to happen is that people get larger spreadsheets with schedules that no longer show April dates by the time May turns to June. For example, many businesses have to align weekly plans which feed into monthly sales metrics. May 1st 2020 for example was the Friday of Week 18, so even though four of the five business days of that week fall within April, it counts as a May sales week (as seen below).



Now as your business is tracking your daily output compared to your weekly plan, you also want to know which sales month it falls in (which as we've established may not be the same month as the day you're looking at). Businesses might want to keep track of this daily data. That means a spreadsheet will be showing 25 lines of "May" workdays before switching to "Jun".

Meanwhile a managerial summary may only track the previous 14 days which means April ("Apr") will be long forgotten. June instead of Jun is only one extra letter and doesn't really add the space that "breaks" the sheet, as ends up happening in the example seen on the right. June eventually turns to July, and you can suddenly forget that you're supposed to be abbreviating all these months. That mistake works all fine and good, it doesn't really impact anything.

Yep, everything looking fine.

No problems at all.

We're going great.

Until now.

We're coming to the end of July, which is followed by August. Now things are getting weird. Do I go back and change all the July to Jul and June to Jun? Do I sneak extra width in and then make August the full month name? It really falls apart when it's September and I'm back to my wide columns again.

We had a sweet ride for the last three spreadsheet-entering months. But the rocky waters are ahead.

The Seinfeld Reunion

"I'm trying to create a Traditional Theory of Critical Theory"

The head writers of the Babylon Bee interview Woke Encyclopedia author James Lindsay. It's really worth your time and attention.

A fact check for @bacciogelato

We literally tore them from their parents’ arms and beat them into using our language.

— Kim Sutherland Mills (@bacciogelato) July 24, 2020

No, Kim, you believed the lie.

Whites saved Red Indian children from their shitty savage parents and educated them in a way their inferior stone-aged culture never could. In fact, that education was exactly what their elders demanded via the treaties.

The 'beatings' were merely corporal punishment, which was the same standards whites used when sending their own children to boarding school. You're a retard Kim. Educate yourself.

Remembering Kelly (twice)

Hey, did you ever hear of Kelly Kelly?

No, not the wrestling character played by Barbara Blank: I'm talking the 7 episode TV show starring Shelley Long. I was a big Shelley Long fan (I typically give up on Cheers rewatches about the time Coach dies, the only Rebecca storylines I like are the Robin Colcord ones because Roger Rees is just awesome), and she even made Money Pit watchable (Hanks was pretty terrible in it).

I never heard of this show until I just happened to see a promo on an old VHS tape. It starred Robert Hays (Striker from Airplane!) as a fireman who married Shelley Long's character Kelly, but his last name is Kelly and therefore you just figured out the name of the title. The only other notable about the cast is that a grown up Chrissy Seaver (Ashley Johnson, who oddly enough was later in two episodes of another sitcom that had the word "Kelly" in the name) played the obligatory hot daughter. Babylon 5's Claudia Christian was in an episode too.

It sounds like the Sound of Music inspired promo ad was the most creative part of the entire show. It's ranked #104 in IMdB's "cancelled catastrophes" list (the aforementioned Married to the Kellys is ranked #101 oddly enough). That sandwiches it in between Deadline starring Oliver Platt, and Brother's Keeper starring absolutely nobody you've ever heard of.

So at least they can say they're considered better than Father of the Pride (the animated show about Siegfried and Roy's soon-to-be-vicious white tigers), Fat Guy Stuck in Internet (a lame Tron ripoff where a computer hacker gets sucked into the internet and an evil CEO tries to get him killed in cyberspace), and two horrible Andy Richter sitcoms (Andy Barker, P.I. and Quintuplets).

Strangely enough, ranked at #32 (so worse than Kelly Kelly is Heartland, the sappy Alberta-based drama which definitely was not cancelled: it has over 200 episodes and has run longer than The Beachcombers or Street Legal.

"Virtue has a veil, vice a mask"

If you're in the States you can easily identify who's voting for far-left idiots in elections because they're the ones wearing masks.

Hiding from the world is a thing for them, it seems.

Advice for Scott Walker

Call their bluff. Say this:
"Wisconsin State Police should be massively defunded and they should be directed to no longer investigate fatal shootings of strangers within the homes of legal gun owners".

They want more Trayvon Martins? Offer them more Trayvon Martins.

1970s America versus 2020 America

The husband and son of the (female) judge in the Epstein civil case have been attacked by a "brazen" gunman.

On Sunday night at the New Brunswick, N.J. home of U.S. District Court Judge Esther Salas, a triggerman murdered her 20-year-old son with a bullet through the heart and critically injured her defence lawyer husband.

Four days before the brazen attack, the judge had been assigned to an ongoing lawsuit launched by Deutsche Bank investors who claim the company made false and misleading statements about its anti-money laundering policies.

More eyebrow raising is the allegation the bank failed to monitor some of its high-risk customers — including sex monster Jeffrey Epstein.

I'm reminded of a case I read about in David Yallop's famous 1984 book In God's Name about the death of Pope John Paul. In it was discussed the difference between the (1970s) American and (1970s) Italian justice systems. Michele Sindona, a Sicilian mobster and "P2" freemason (who Yallop believes was involved in the murder of John Paul I) is having some legal troubles in the good ol' US of A:

The first was the evidence given at the extradition proceedings by a witness named Nicola Biase. Biase was a former employee of Sindona and his evidence was deemed to be dangerous. Sindona set about making it ‘safe’. After discussing the problem with the Mafia Gambino family a small contract was put out. It was to be nothing particularly sinister. Biase, his wife, family and lawyer were to have their lives threatened. If they succumbed to the threats and Biase withdrew his evidence, the matter would rest there. If Biase refused to co-operate with the Mafia, then the Gambino family and Sindona planned to ‘review’ the situation. The review did not augur well for the continued good health of Biase. The contract for less than 1,000 dollars would be amended to a more appropriate one. The contract was given to Luigi Ronsisvalle and Bruce McDowall. Ronsisvalle is by profession a hired killer.

Another contract was also discussed with Ronsisvalle. The Mafia advised him that Michele Sindona required the death of Assistant United States District Attorney, John Kenney.

Nothing so clearly illustrates the mentality of Michele Sindona as the contract that was put out on John Kenney. The attorney was the chief prosecutor in the extradition hearings, the man leading the US Government’s attack on Sindona’s continued presence within the United States. Sindona reasoned that if Kenney were eliminated the problem would disappear. It would act as a warning to the Government that he, Michele Sindona, was objecting to the heat. The investigation should cease. There should be no more irritating court appearances, no more absurd attempts to get him sent back to Italy. The thought processes at work here are 100 per cent Sicilian Mafia. It is a philosophy that works again and again in Italy. It is an essential part of the Italian Solution. The authorities can be cowed, and are. Investigators replacing a murdered colleague will move very slowly. Sindona reasoned that what was effective in Palermo would work in New York.

Luigi Ronsisvalle, although a professional murderer, baulked at accepting the contract. The fee of 100,000 dollars looked good but Ronsisvalle, with a deeper appreciation of the American way of life than Sindona, did not envisage having much opportunity to spend it. If Kenney were murdered there would be waves, big ones. Ronsisvalle began to seek someone, on behalf of the Gambino family, who fancied his chances of survival after killing a district attorney.

The idea, of course, is that unlike in Sicily an American jurist being assassinated would result in billions of dollars being devoted to dedicate the entire stretch of the U.S. justice and policing systems to bring the killer to justice.

But that was 1970s America. This is 2020. It will be interesting to see if the attack on Salas is treated by American justice the same way that Ronsisvalle presumed an attack on John Kenney would be.

Donald (insert name here)

CSI Pegasus Galaxy

"Vegas" is listed by Episode Ninja as the 11th worst episode of Stargate Atlantis with a rating of 7.29? Yes that's right, the worst, not the best.

This isn't just a quirk of the ratings system either: Reddit user /r/Waylain got a lot of agreement for calling it the worst episode. The IMdB page for "Vegas" is higher at 8.2/10 but that still puts it lower than the next and final episode "Enemy at the Gates" and several other Season 5 episodes.

It seems very shocking that the episode is rated so low seeing how it's one of the most entertaining and enjoyable episodes. I think part of it is that the fans of the show don't like things that are narratively different: "The Real World" (where Torri Higginson's Doctor Weir has the requisite Buffy the Vampire Slayer-style "in a mental hospital where the real world tells you that the fantastic TV show the character is in is a delusion) is the 4th worst episode according to the popular ranking site.

This is somewhat all shocking. "The Real World" isn't the greatest episode SGA ever did, but it's certainly in the top half of their episodes rather than the bottom 20th. It has Cameron from Ferris Bueller's Day Off for crying out loud! Again, it's a different type of story than most of the other episodes and therefore is shunned. This is the only way to explain the low rating.

For those who don't know, Stargate Atlantis is in general a sci-fi show about humans who travel to the lost "continent" of Atlantis (actually a large city that can become a spaceship) which is actually sitting on an ocean in the "far-off" Pegasus Galaxy (which is actually a member of our Local Group and is only a dwarf galaxy but close enough). The ancient civilization who created Atlantis also created a network of wormholes between planets (entered through the eponymous Stargates) within Galaxies and therefore our human heroes travel the Pegasus galaxy having adventures. An evil group called the Wraith who inhabit Pegasus Galaxy and consume humans are the primary antagonist (who 10,000 years ago defeated the Stargate builders and chased them back to our galaxy).

That's the setting for most of the series. "Vegas" takes a different track: inspired by CSI, it opens on Earth where the main character from Stargate Atlantis (Joe Flanigan's John Sheppard) is investigating a crime scene in the deserts outside of Sin City. In most episodes Flanigan's character is an Air Force officer working in Atlantis, in this episode set in an alternate reality he's a lackadaisical detective disillusioned with the world. The victim appears to have been killed in the same way that the Wraith kill their victims: "feeding" off of them by sucking life energy out of the human's chest with a mouth-like appendage on the hand. The general populace in the main series are never told about aliens and this is true in this alternate universe as well: none of the cops can figure out what happened. The style is very CSI-ish: Flanigan is wearing sunglasses just like Caruso always wore, and as the cops look at the scene and describe the evidence we flashback to quick cuts of the actual crime being committed. The regular TV theme is cut short as well.

We start seeing regular Stargate Atlantis characters almost immediately: Jewel Staite's Dr. Jennifer Keller appears as the coroner at the start of the first act. Most of the SGA actors appear (Rachel Luttrell and Jason Momoa are credited by SAG rules but never appear), though in the alternate timeline we're never sure who's involved where at their first appearance). We watch the next victim sick in his hotel room having to confront his noisy neighbour who turns out to be our Wraith killer. Woolsey (Robert Picardo) shows up as an FBI agent basically just for "hey lookie" moments, and as Sheppard investigates the hotel victim we see the Wraith rocking out to Marilyn Manson as he applies heavy makeup to just look like a weird goth guy and hits the town. Is it the music that upsets people? They cut from "Beautiful People" to Rolling Stones, admittedly the music montages don't feel sci-fi but that's sort of the point. Sheppard tails Goth-Wraith through some in-casino B-roll and joins the same high-stakes poker game run by very stereotypical mob tough guys.

It turns out the Wraith in this reality have psychic powers they don't in the main TV show reality and Goth-Wraith cleans up in the poker game. Sheppard seems to intuit that he's always going to lose, which causes a confrontation ending with Goth-Wraith beating up everybody in the room as Sheppard chases him through the streets. Witnessing Goth-Wraith's superhuman abilities that allow the creature to evade capture leads Sheppard to search Goth-Wraith's hotel room, finding the latest victim and various other future clues. This is where the CSI aspects of the episode mostly fall off: Woolsey returns to turn this more sci-fi: Sheppard is taken to Area 51 where we see Rodney Mackay (David Hewlett) who fills him on on the science fiction world and also the backstory of this John Sheppard (not quite as fortunate as his "real" counterpart). Stargate Atlantis has done a few parallel world episodes before, and while it's not clear it appears this MacKay met an alternate reality John Sheppard from a parallel reality closer to the "normal" one than this one, but still not the same one from the main series.

Between MacKay and Goth-Wraith's flashbacks, we learn that a Wraith invasion of Earth was recently thwarted and Goth-Wraith appears to be one of two survivors, the other being the Wraith "Todd" (Christopher Heyerdahl) who has several appearances in the series. This one uses his psychic power to talk about the thoughts of Goth-Wraith couched as seeing the future though we don't know it at the time. Instead MacKay explains that Goth-Wraith is building some sort of alien device for an unknown purpose: it's exposing him to high doses of radiation which is why he keeps feeding on human victims and therefore regenerate his health. Sheppard overhears Mackay and fellow scientist Zelenka (David Nykl) debate possibilities of the device's purpose: MacKay insists it's going to be an intergalactic distress beacon that would require a lot of power. Regardless they need to find Goth-Wraith before he enacts whatever he's planning, and MacKay lets Sheppard go after giving him an "alternate you was awesome I met him" pep-talk that usually happens in these episodes. The Star Trek Enterprise episode "In a Mirror, Darkly" did much the same thing: the alternate universe versions of our heroes get told how awesome the folks we're used to seeing every week age.

Back in Vegas Sheppard rolls up his iconic Johnny Cash poster and quits his job, for...some reason. And then the Man in Black himself plays. Remember that I said the music was maybe one of the things that upset people? That seems to be the case here even though what we get is undeniably awesome: Cash's cover of Neil Diamond's second best song "Solitary Man" plays as Sheppard drives across the desert thinking about all of the disparate clues he saw within the episode. Getting his silent epiphany he does the mid-highway spinout and returns to track down Goth-Wraith.

Back at Area 51 the rest of the cast are trying to track Goth-Wraith down (with the requisite Robert Picardo Star Trek joke) only for Sheppard to report success: Goth-Wraith is in his airstream about to tap directly into the powerlines feeding from the Hoover Dam towards Vegas. They dispatch the legendary A-10 Warthogs to take care of the airstream. In the meantime though Sheppard and the Wraith engage in a gunbattle which buys the planes time at the cost of Sheppard's life. The distress beacon activates but is destroyed before it can do much damage...all that happens is a small wormhole is opened and the distress signal is sent into an alternate reality (to this alternate reality). The day is saved.

Well for this reality. A certain alternate reality fans of the TV show are familiar with kind of gets screwed.

So what makes the episode great? It's got a real sense of fun. Not the campy wink-wink fun of episodes like the Stargate SG1 100th and 200th episodes, rather a more pastiche of another series. I don't even watch CSI but getting a different kind of story and the actors playing slightly twerked versions of the ones we already know is always enjoyable. There's great actors (the mob bosses were all Sopranos veterans) and great action and it ends with Sheppard slowly dying to Johnny Cash knowing he's done well by the universe that previously had been screwing him over. Again much like "In a Mirror, Darkly" a lot of the fun is from the writers and producers being able to do a "kill off major characters" plot due to the alternate universe conceit, which is why both episodes stand out from what can be stifling in-universe continuity issues for "main" episodes. Still, I've probably watched "Vegas" more often than any other Stargate Atlantis episode and the pulpy nature of the story is a huge contributing factor.

Stay tuned for our next Stargate Atlantis coverage where we review a truly terrible episode...okay, probably not likely. It would be the one with the Pegasus Tribunal right? Or maybe the one with the lame Ghostbusters 2016 style all-female team shoved down our throats because Nicole de Boer is hot.

"With the click of a button, I could wipe out any conversations emanating from the regular old plebs who are the Twitter version of flyover country"

Andrew Lawton, the pride of London Ontario, eviscerates the media gatekeepers in the wake of the recent Twitter hack:

While the checkmark may seem – and ultimately is – laughably insignificant, it's the symptom of a bigger problem and the cause of another.

Twitter's stated purpose for blue checkmarks is to demonstrate an "account of public interest is authentic." Those in the media (who comprise the bulk of blue-check holders) tend to view a checkmark not as a symbol of authenticity but rather of ascension to some higher moral or intellectual stratum.

Perhaps the great Blue Check Lockdown of 2020 was a cosmic penance for the collective self-righteousness of the group – we may never know.

Coming in the middle of this year's unending mass cancelation, it was, I'd say, a welcome episode to see the elites who find perspectives other than their own repugnant forced to sit on their hands, even if only for a short time.

It's why the graduates who populate most newsrooms are so woefully unequipped to write about national trends when a majority are from liberal, coastal states and have never seen a farm, fired a gun or stepped foot on a factory floor.

The state broadcaster in my very own deranged dominion of Canada was busted (by me) a few weeks back for broadcasting a children's "news" segment calling J.K. Rowling "transphobic" for daring to suggest only women are capable of menstruation.

The network later said the segment didn't meet its journalistic standards (that CBC has standards is, in and of itself, newsworthy.) I don't doubt that there were producers and writers from downtown Toronto who were genuinely shocked that anyone could possibly believe what Rowling did.

The answer to the divide is dialogue and debate. The answer is to engage with the culture rather than run away from it. The answer is to keep fighting. But in spite of that, I won't deny that it was nice, for a couple of hours this week, to see the silencers silenced.

Two (Bing) girls, one (Bing) cup

Last month I wrote about drinking a beer with various Star Trek actors. With that post I made a quick and dirty photo mockup to go along with it (and no I'm not talking about Nicole de Boer in a bra and panties).

Not meaning to go inside baseball, but I needed a photo of two men at a bar. So I go into my search bar (defaults to Bing) and enters "two men at a bar".

So, uh...this is what comes up.



Then you switch over to Google, same search, and suddenly everything looks normal...



(click both pictures to view full-size)

Edmonton ESKIMOS

Always the Edmonton ESKIMOS.

Never buy tickets or merchandise for anything else. Never stop cheering any other name.

Unless they change it to one of the following:
Edmonton White Men are Superiors
Edmonton Redskins
Edmonton Engines (say it 5 times fast and you'll get it.

The 1793 Project

Years ago I considered a post that would discuss how, thanks to Rachel Arab's expanded "workplace harassment and violence" laws, Alberta businesses would be forced to undergo far-left ideological adoption of the sort of safe space snowflakeism that permeated college/university campuses.

I never wrote it. But last month Robby Soave did:

While some critics have dismissed the idea that the antics of safety-obsessed college students matter very much to the broader culture, I've long warned that the small number—proportionally speaking—of young people inclined toward these tactics could do serious damage elsewhere. As I wrote in my book Panic Attack, "It's not impossible to imagine the same kind of thing happening in the workplace: picture a boss who is afraid to reprimand negligent young employees out of concern that they will say their PTSD is triggered."

Recent events at The New York Times are an almost perfect demonstration of how this is playing out. Staffers angry about an op-ed by Sen. Tom Cotton (R–Ark.) claimed that its publication threatened their very lives. They specifically chose "running this puts black Times staff in danger" as their mantra because it invokes workplace safety. When the authority figure—the boss, the principal, the government—is responsible for ensuring safety, and safety is broadly defined as not merely protection from literal physical violence but also the fostering of emotional comfort, norms of classical liberalism will suffer. (One activist told me that for him, safety requires other people to affirm him.) The Times conflict ended with opinion page chief James Bennet out of his job.

Soave doesn't tie it into "workplace harassment" legislation, but perhaps that's because in the bellweathers of broader far-left U.S. culture it is no longer even necessary.

Ironically, the same subset of people ostensibly exercised about emotional safety—the woke left—seem frequently inclined to level unsubstantiated accusations that inflict emotional harm. This makes it difficult to believe that these Twitter warriors' true aim is the promotion of psychological comfort. Did any of them consider Uhlig's mental health after the man was baselessly accused? Does anyone care about Roman, who probably did not expect her enemies to ransack her Myspace page for evidence of racism and then pillory her for a photo taken when she was 23? What about Shor, thrown to the wolves for making a reasonable objection to what one wing of the protesters was doing?

That sounds like terror, not safety. Call it the 1793 Project.

A look back in angora whyte

From 2013, pictures of Whyte Ave at night. I think I've met that asian chick about halfway down who's on the left with her mouth open with her friend.

Don't bother reading anything else by the lying scum of an author though.

This is what free speech looks like

I am totally 100% opposed to the RCMP "investigating" a letter that merely expresses in a crude graphic that catch-all putdown: "drop dead".



This was not a specific or even general threat: it was simply saying "this is what I think of you". Even in far-left Canada that legally falls under protected speech and obviously morally falls under the acceptable realm of political expression which must be allowed to be expressed.

Not even in a panic did we need fake meat

A few days ago I talked about how I'm finally breaking into my supplies purchased during the Wuhan Flu hoarding era.

I know I took some photos of baking aisle without any shortages except for flour, but try as I might I couldn't find where it was. I did find a picture of empty shelves somebody else sent me and used that in the post instead.

What I also found were a series of photos of empty meat shelves during the pandemic...except for one conspicuous product.

(click to view full size)


I'm really unsure how Beyond Meat still had any stock market valuation after all this.

Romulan A.I. research

Related.

Black art sucks

Hey, is maybe the reason nigger artists aren't as successful as they think they should be at all related to how shitty their art is?

This one looks like Floyd's 6yr old daughter drew it in between her being told lies about her criminal daddy.

This one is called "I See God in Us/Trinity" rather than "three fat negresses apparently looking into a crystal ball.

Are there any good pieces of art? This one isn't bad, but it's also just an artist representation of an already well-known character. It's only interesting because of the white-man created media property you associate with it.

"Oh My God!"

If you play any amount of FTL you have at least one and possibly two keys binded to "pause" (middle mouse button and spacebar for me). As a result, it's also amazing when you watch how far RedLetterMedia's Rich Evans progressed without pausing the game...

UPitt black-only graduation

Story: Students Demand Pitt Eliminate Free Speech Protections

Black Pitt, which did not return a request for comment, went further than merely targeting speech on campus. The list of demands includes a black-only graduation, an overhaul of university curriculum to be more "inclusive and comprehensive regarding the plight and triumphs of black people" and to "include the black narrative," an established master's and Ph.D. program in "black studies," and for the university to sever ties with the city of Pittsburgh's police department.

Meme: (click to view full-size)

June 2020

There will possibly never be a month for this blog like June of 2020. 112 posts over 30 days for an average of a post every 6 hours 25 minutes 43 seconds.

As I warned at the 3000th post, this wasn't going to be sustainable long-term: I expect in July to start scaling back and even moreso in August. Summer vacations will do that, you know.

Alternate theory

Dozens of Winnipeg women, desperate enough to sleep with ugly Winnipeg men, try to save face by claiming they were given a roofie.

No I'm serious: having been to Winnipeg a few times (I was, pre-COVID, supposed to be there this summer actually) and talking with Winnipeg girls who have, not meaning to stroke my own ego, thrown themselves at me because of hot I was by virtue of clearly not being a local, this theory is easily more common than the CBC "oh woe is woman" talking point.

The most insane cancel culture twist

The country music band Lady Antebellum, who changed it to "Lady A" because apparently it offended #NiggerLivesMoreImportantThanSocietyMotherFucker, has now sued the (black) singer already known as Lady A for not letting them have the name she already was using that they just decided is theirs.

On June 11, members of the band Lady A (Hillary Scott, Charles Kelley and Dave Haywood) renounced their name saying when they formed 14 years ago, they didn't consider the pre-Civil War "associations that weigh down this word," including ties to slavery.

Wouldn't it be something if, when this all ended up before a judge, he ruled that they legally had to change their name back to Lady Antebellum?

Fake News

Tell us exactly what was on the poster, CBC.

You won't, of course. You won't allow comments on the video for the same reason.

Because if we saw the actual poster we'd know it wasn't a big deal. You're lying fake news.

Kill yourselves.

Baking powder

Can't find my picture of the aisle amply supplied of everything else, so I have to use this donated photo instead.

Hey remember when "baking supplies" were being emptied from store shelves for some obscure thing called...hold on let me confirm...a "COVID-19"?

One of the things that I had noted at the time was that it wasn't really "baking supplies" that were being emptied out. It was flour. Just flour. If you wanted yeast, brown sugar, baking powder, baking soda, condensed milk, etc. it didn't really affect you. This stuck me as more than a little strange: what on earth were these people making?

CTV made it all about homemade artisanal bread which I think was only a dozen people with active Instagram accounts. This all happened just after toilet paper and I think everybody just started hoarding flour because they noticed some random post of empty shelves of flour. Anyways having heard that flour was running low (in grocery stores mind you, Bulk Barn always had plenty of flour including the much superior barley flour) everybody just started mass hoarding flour in case they ran out. Why did they need flour? They just did. As I joked at the time, there can't be that many people needing to make gravy or roux.

Regardless the point of this story is that when this baking supplies shortage began to be a thing, I succumbed. I also gave into madness, as it were. You see, I noticed that my container of baking powder was getting low and thought I should buy a backup. So I bought a second pack of baking powder. And today, finally, I used up the last of my baking powder and needed to open the one I had previously bought.

I'm still waiting to open that extra package of toilet paper I bought in late March though.

Sir Humphrey on far-left hypocrisy

From the classic Yes, Prime Minister episode "The Bishop's Gambit" comes this exchange about a socially conservative Anglican pastor and why he is dangerous to governments as a Bishop with a seat in the House of Lords:

Humphrey: He's also against oppression in Africa.

Hacker: So are we.

Humphrey: But he's against it from black AND white governments.

Hacker: Oh. You mean he's a racist?

You can watch it yourself at roughly 26:05 in the video below:

Female-centric cities would have buildings that leak once every 28 days

Yesterday Rush Limbaugh opened his show talking about this article from (of course) The Guardian:

Glass ceilings and phallic towers. Mean streets and dark alleys. Road names and statues of men. From the physical to the metaphorical, the city is filled with reminders of masculine power. And yet we rarely talk of the urban landscape as an active participant in gender inequality. A building, no matter how phallic, isn’t actually misogynist, is it? Surely a skyscraper isn’t responsible for sexual harassment, the wage gap, or even the glass ceiling, whether it has a literal one up top or not?

That said, our built environments can still reflect patterns of gender-based discrimination. To imagine the city and its structures as neutral places where complicated human social relations are staged is to ignore the simple fact that people built these places. As the feminist geographer Jane Darke has said: “Our cities are patriarchy written in stone, brick, glass and concrete.” In other words, cities reflect the norms of the societies that build them. And sexism is a deep-rooted norm.

Here's the thing: expanding cities and draining people out of the rural areas was the left's idea

Remember urban sprawl? The solution was supposed to be, yes that's right, large cities with buildings stretching high into the sky. The Guardian article has a photo of the Chicago River: when you take a Chicago river tour you might hear the tour guide excitedly talk about how, sure the majestic Trump Tower is the second-tallest building in the city (after the Sears Tower, of course), but the under-construction Vista Tower will be the 3rd tallest building in Chicago and the tallest skyscraper in the world designed by a woman^†. So "masculine and phallic" is something women are getting into too. Surprise surprise, women like a giant phallus as much if not more than men do.

^† Hilariously enough, one of the distinguishing features of this phallic building designed by a woman is "blow-through floors"

So after demanding an end to urban sprawl, now the demented left doesn't like how urban densification involves a lot of buildings that look like erect penises. They hate the physical requirements of the very spaces they demand.

Donald J. Trump's July 3rd speech

Tucker nails it:


The full text. It's really quite amazing.

We will state the truth in full without apology. We declare that the United States of America is the most just and exceptional nation ever to exist on earth. We are proud of the fact that our country was founded on Judeo-Christian principles and we understand that these values have dramatically advanced the cause of peace and justice throughout the world. We know that the American family is the bedrock of American life. We recognize the solemn right and moral duty of every nation to secure its borders and we are building the wall. We remember that governments exist to protect the safety and happiness of their own people. A nation must care for its own citizens first. We must take care of America first. It’s time. We believe in equal opportunity, equal justice, and equal treatment for citizens of every race, background, religion and creed. Every child of every color, born and unborn, is made in the holy image of God.

Young Ontario niggers are dumb and violent (just ask their teachers)

It turns out that racially blind practices in Ontario schools "disproportionately" affect black students.

Streaming — in which students must choose to pursue either an "academic" or "applied" track when they begin high school — has been shown to disproportionately affect Black and low-income students when it comes to graduation rates and the chance of going to a post-secondary institution.

Details of the province's decision were first published in the Toronto Star on Monday morning. In an exclusive interview with the newspaper, Education Minister Stephen Lecce called streaming a "systemic, racist, discriminatory" practice.

Doug Ford's administration in general and Steve Lecce in particular are continuing their slow descent (maybe not even that slow!) into liberal lunacy.

Do you remember back in the 90s when one of the knocks of Canadian education was how blunt and lumbering it was? I remember in Alberta "streaming" was particularly fetishized by "educators" and activists. In Europe, you see, around the time of Grade 8 or Grade 9, students are given aptitude and interest examinations to try to determine what they wanted out of high school: from an academic education (clumsily already existing in Alberta in the vein of Math 20, Chemistry 30, Math 33, Physics 10, etc.), or a more applied education for the guys who dreamed of being welders and graduating with a GPA of exactly 50.1% (no, seriously, one of my good friends in High School literally calculated how much of his Social 33 departmental exam he needed to finish to get a 51% final grade). In big cities there was also the International Baccalaureate program for the intensely academic, and increasingly in places like Edmonton's Victoria Composite High School programs for those with more artistic interests. Not comparable to the States of course there are still a few schools like Harry Ainley who push for athletic pursuits so students can get those sweet sweet full scholarships to places like Duke or University of Michigan (while even the best of the International Baccalaureate students is lucky to get a 75% scholarship: I was mostly offered 50% ones myself).

While still nowhere near what Europe has been doing (remember those bygone days when European countries were the places we all needed to emulate?), it sounds like the Ontario education system similarly developed along the same lines as Alberta: trying to customize the high school courseload for the very diverse and divergent types of students who were walking into those doors. It does the future welder or future forklift driver no favours to be spending hours making him (and yes most often the sex ratio was skewed so that the 13/23/33 course streams were majority male while the 10/20/30 streams were majority grls -- though we boys, one notes without hesitation, also were at the top of that heap) learn that "wherefore art thou Romeo" means "do you exist" and not "where are you".

Note above that I mentioned that there was a sex imbalance between the programs. Does this mean high schools are systemically misandrist? Of course, not, anymore than you would say that the prison system is systemically misandrist. Of course, the same argument can (and has) been made about prisons: nobody would say that men being imprisoned beyond their proportion of the general population means the system is biased against them...yet you'll find a lot of morons insisting that niggers are being systematically discriminated against because they are imprisoned beyond their proportion of the general population.

Turns out the same narrow thinking has bothered these same morons about Ontario public schools.

A 2017 report led by York University professor Carl James found that Black teens in the Greater Toronto Area were being streamed into applied course tracks at significantly higher rates than other students.

Fifty-three per cent of Black students were in academic programs as compared to 81 per cent of white and 80 per cent of other so-called racialized students, meaning those who are part of other visible minorities. Conversely, 39 per cent of Black students were enrolled in applied programs, compared to 18 per cent of other racialized groups and 16 per cent of white students.

Meanwhile, a 2015 report from the group People for Education found that students taking applied courses in Grade 9 were much less likely to go to university and that students from low-income groups were more likely to enrol in applied courses.

The data shows black kids can't handle academics and have behavioural issues.

Leece doesn't go out and say it, and obviously neither do the activists, but this study by Carl James indicates that black kids can't handle academics. Even by the apparently weak standards of the infamously bad Ontario school system, it's crazy that 80% of nonblacks are in academic programs: my own memories of Alberta High School is a few years old, but I am pretty sure that the number of students in Social Studies 30 was smaller than the number of students in Social Studies 33. Even if our group was larger, we weren't significantly larger, so I would put the breakdown as 40-60 between academic-applied (to use the Ontario nomenclature). Even if I had it backwards^†, it would be 60-40 and not 70-30 and definitely not 80-20. Yet with this dumbing down of the Ontario curriculum nigger kids still only go into the academic stream at 65% the rate of whites and "other so-called racialized students" by which I can assume we mean asians with some Middle Easterners and (non-red) Indians tossed into the balance. This is the GTA after all. Meanwhile, the same article mentions another disparity assumed to be caused by "systemic racism":

The Ministry of Education also says it will implement a ban on suspensions for students in junior kindergarten to Grade 3, another practice that has been shown to disproportionately impact Black students.

The 2017 study by James reported that 42 per cent of all Black students in the Toronto, York, Peel and Durham school boards had been suspended at least once by the time they left high school.

The review found that Black students make up only 10.2 per cent of the secondary school population in Peel but represent about 22.5 per cent of the students receiving suspensions. Further, reviewers heard anecdotally that some principals "use any excuse" to suspend Black students, including wearing hoodies or hoop earrings.

They try to explain it away with "hoop earrings and hoodies" when we all know they really mean "little black girls are stabbing their classmates with hoop earrings and little black boys all wearing identical hoodies beat up classmates and then collectively deny it was them". Still, this is another data point indicating that this race is also violent and cannot be civilized to the degree their nonblack classmates can be.

^† It's worth noting that both Kurn and Martok, who also went to High School in different parts of rural Alberta, disagree with me: Kurn thinks 10-20-30 was the notable majority and Martok thinks it was half and half.

Outcomes don't prove "systemic racism"

In both studies, along with all the studies "proving" "systemic racism" by showing inequity in outcomes, what's missing is the mechanism. What in "the system" is causing this? Just claiming it's there to make sure the CBC and Toronto Star editorial board say nice things about you doesn't make it true. Where in "the system" is it racist and discriminatory? Are the tests Eurocentric (please don't ask how the asians seem unaffected by this)? Are the students being asked to perform math questions on the aptitude exam while somebody sits just outside the room with a basketball and a basket of fried chicken? Are the musical composition theory questions all about notes and not stupid backbeats while constantly yelling "cellphone" into a mic?

No mechanism of how "the system" is racist, no systemic racism.

The CBC article seems to imply that the problem is racist teachers. Ah yes, the Canadian teaching profession: that same body who writes the curriculum to teach far-left lies to your children (lies like the evil sodomitic lifestyle is good, that healthcare obviously has to come from the government, and that poor Red Indians have been mistreated by the taxpayer and forced into evil schools), is apparently just full of haters and racists.

Please ignore that these same teachers who vote 95% left-wing apparently are also delighting in torturing black kids for the crime of having hoop earrings. (If this seems familiar to you, I noted a decade ago that the Alberta Teachers union seemed to think their teachers were such right-wing racists it was mandatory to exclude their statements from Human Rights Commission oversight)

The big lie

They keep telling these stupid lies. Pandering politicians like Lecce keep regurgitating the lies and giving them extra weight because now "even conservative [sic] politicians admit this so why can't you you ignorant hater". Do people keep believing these lies? Apparently.

Yet the fact remains: Ontario education policies deliberately brought in with the intention of improving education outcomes and letting students obtain the secondary education that will suit them the best for the rest of their lives is now going away "because racism". Nothing racist has been shown in the system itself: the two competing arguments seem to be the "far-left teachers are all super duper racist and hate black children", and "black children are culturally and intellectually inferior". If you look at the top of this post you'll see a graphic showing IQa across the planet. Despite all the claims that IQ tests are culturally biased, there hasn't been a single IQ test yet that has shown that blacks do as well or better than any other race.

Nigger kids in Ontario are dumb and violent. We can try to reorganize school systems to try to disguise that fact, but we can never make it go away. The truth is out there.

RIP Charlie Daniels

On Saturday I posted about July Fourth and embedded a YouTube video of Charlie Daniels' immortal "This Ain't No Rag, It's a Flag.

Yesterday, Charlie Daniels died.

Obviously all the obituaries you'll be seeing make reference to his greatest hit: "The Devil Went Down to Georgia". You may recall it appeared on this blog six years ago mainly to bemoan how bad his PG-rated "sequel" song was. It's a good song, I enjoy it.

But in deference to my father's favourite Charlie Daniels song, let's give a classic listen to his "Uneasy Rider" (or as he always thought it was named, "Ballad of the Uneasy Rider"):


Rest in peace, Charlie. Shame you both lived long enough to witness the leftist destruction of the country you loved but not long enough to watch us slaughter them in the upcoming civil war.

This day in (blog) history

There's no Calgary Stampede this year. Eleven years ago there was and I went.

Hot asian chicks seen in skirts, cowboy hats, cowboy boots, and frilly tanktop: 190
Hot black chicks seen in skirts, cowboy hats, cowboy boots, and frilly tanktop: 2

Sadly I've been looking through my photo archives and can't find the 2009 or 2012 Stampede photos (the last time I went).

Wuhan Flu "Systemic Racism" means an end to immigration

Last month I wrote about how, using Shiny Pony's own logic against him, Canada needs to end all immigration.

Well curiously enough, with the myth of systemic racism going round many of the same public policy points are true: if systemic racism is a problem in Canada, then why are we allowing any nonwhite immigrants into Canada?

The theory is that Canada is a horrible racist country. Again, your expert in these matters is a man by the name of Trudeau, from Queerbec. This is his theory. It says that Canada is horribly unfair to nonwhites, and that they are constantly mistreated and maligned to the point that their lives are in jeopardy. This isn't a "bad apples" thing either: by this theory everything in Canada is racist and causing them harm.

So the question becomes^†, why are we putting these blacks at risk by bringing them from Africa and the Caribbean to Canada? Yes yes, the immigration fetishists keep telling us about all the good immigrants can do, and whether they are right or wrong this is very ethnocentric of them. Even if immigration is so good for Canada, if it's bad for the immigrants we're being awfully scummy bringing so many of them in. And as usual by "we" I mean Rat Bastard 2.0 and the rest of the Laurentian Elite.

^† Okay, fine, if you're thinking about this for more than thirty seconds you'll also ask the question "wait if Canada is so bad why are they all coming here?" After all, this isn't 1911 where Canada basically conned Germans and Ukranians into moving out to Alberta by showing them false pictures of what Canada would be like. Presumably Kenyan immigrants to Toronto can WhatsApp and email friends back home saying "don't come here, it's so rayyyciiisttt" and the flow of immigrants would cease naturally.

If this logic sounds vaguely familiar by the way, We The Internet did a video about this just over a year ago:


The point stands: if these caring leftists were really so anxious to protect fragile ethnic minorities why are they not doing more to keep immigrants away from Trump's America. But if the racism is "systemic" then it's not Trump's America but just plain old America (or Canada, in this particular case). After all, if Canada is really that rotten, who could want to subject those poor dark skinned folks to such a hellhole?

Where's white guilt when you need it?

Happy (last) Birthday, America!

Today is Independence Day, the day that the Americans celebrate the birth of their country, even though it's basically just the day the Continental Congress agreed to the wording of the Declaration of Independence.

It's also possibly going to be the last one, if the shameful acts taking place in Vancouver on Canada Day is any indication.

I was hoping for nice weather to go down to the Devon Overpass, because Americans who have found their beaches recently closed can be taunted with photos. Alas, I'll just have to stick to bourbon whisky and Toby Keith records.



Bonus coverage: Mark Steyn has a 59 minute audio special about the "Glorious Fourth".

Green(back) Privilege

You want to talk about Privilege?

Okay, lets start with the Dollar Privilege.

Congrats to everybody!

I didn't think Operation Ship the Niggers Back to Africa and Make Them Think It Was Their Idea was going to work, but apparently I was wrong.

Edmonton Eskimos are 1-1 this week

This week the Edmonton Eskimos are 1-1 in their public relations. Obviously not on the field, since the CFL season is spiked due to the Wuhan Flu.

The win came today when the Eskimos confirmed that the name "Eskimos" will not be changed despite a lot of whining from the usual far-left groups. They believe that "Eskimo" is an offensive term. It isn't of course, but that's a fact and facts don't matter to these people. They just want to burn burn burn.

The most commonly accepted etymological origin of the word "Eskimo" is derived by Ives Goddard at the Smithsonian Institution, from the Montagnais word meaning "snowshoe-netter" or "to net snowshoes". The word assime·w means "she laces a snowshoe" in Montagnais. Montagnais speakers refer to the neighbouring Mi'kmaq people using words that sound like eskimo

In 1978, Jose Mailhot, a Quebec anthropologist who speaks Montagnais, published a paper suggesting that Eskimo meant "people who speak a different language". French traders who encountered the Montagnais in the eastern areas, adopted their word for the more western peoples and spelled it as Esquimau in a transliteration.

Some people consider Eskimo offensive because it is popularly perceived to mean "eaters of raw meat" in Algonquian languages common to people along the Atlantic coast. One Cree speaker suggested the original word that became corrupted to Eskimo might have been askamiciw (which means "he eats it raw"); the Inuit are referred to in some Cree texts as askipiw (which means "eats something raw").

That nobody who actually knows anything about languages finds it at all offensive is meaningless. It's like the recent controversy in Australia about Coon Cheese because some people like to call aborigines "coons" (which is unfair, it should be reserved exclusively for niggers). Coon Cheese is named after a dude with the surname Coon, but that fact doesn't hold these idiots back. They're allergic to facts. They don't want facts in the discussion because they'll lose the discussion (related: they also don't want a discussion).

The loss came earlier this week when the Green and Gold made the absolutely disgusting move of releasing Christion Jones for the "crime" of offending the NDP and speaking out against an evil and illegitimate lifestyle choice. Dyke MLA Janis Irwin complained about it, and after a brief period of refusing to apologize Jones made his one mistake: he made an apology. It didn't help, the Eskimos fired him for his deep-seated religious beliefs mere minutes later.

Never apologize Christion. Never.

Meanwhile though shame on the Eskimos: once you start succumbing to the mob they just intensify and move onto new targets. You'd think an organization endlessly under assault for a name incorrectly considered a racial slur would be a little more supportive of the people on the right side of history: people like me and Jones. Here's what Jones said, and it's worth mentioning I agree with every word of it because it is 100% true.


Man isn't supposed to be with a man. Woman isn't supposed to be with a woman. The choice they made is the wrong choice and they are fundamentally wicked for choosing it. They must change back or be changed back. Janis Irwin is only supposed to get dick and if she disagrees then her broken brain must be fixed to cure her of this incorrect orientation.

This is a huge own-goal, Eskimos. Faggots don't watch the CFL. Accommodating their sick delusions will never put their sodomitic butts into the seats at Commonwealth Stadium.

Defending yourself from the Antifa Riots

The Phantom Soapbox wants to know if you know that when the mob comes for you, you'll be helpless.

Canadians please note: This scenario will not go well for you if you are trying to protect your home and your family.

I remain unconvinced. If enough of us slaughter enough of them, it'll all be over.

Never mess with British Rail

I was rewatching the Season 12 NCIS episode "So It Goes" featuring a young Dr. Mallard (Adam Campbell, looking not horribly unlike young David McCallum as seen below) and his falling out with his crush and his best friend upon joining the British Army in 1968.

One early scene beings in a train station where Mallard is booking a train from London to Dover (which I've done as well, and highly recommend) and has to deal with a long-winded ticket booth operator (ha! irony!). It's a throwaway scene basically just there to introduce the setup and characters for the 1968 flashback portions of the episode. Normal people might forget it even existed a few days later.

Trainspotters are not normal.

Okay this isn't strictly speaking trainspotting as featured in Trainspotting: from the Railfan Wikipedia page (no, seriously):

Those who are "trainspotters" make an effort to "spot" all of a certain type of rolling stock. This might be a particular class of locomotive, a particular type of carriage or all the rolling stock of a particular company. To this end, they collect and exchange detailed information about the movements of locomotives and other equipment on the railway network, and become very knowledgeable about its operations.

This is more what David Mitchell discusses in his "British Attitude to Food" YouTube rant about how British men get obsessed with things like train numbers.

By "more what" I mean, of course, "precisely what". Because at least one obsessed British man has an entry in the "Goofs" section of the IMdB page for the episode about that scene that is as long as all other goofs combined, even the Doctor Who one (which David Mitchell might also comment on):

When Ducky is waiting at the station in flashback and Maggie walks in, there is an announcement for the next departure over the tannoy as they converse. The announcer states that the next departure from platform 3 calls at "Canterbury East, Ashford, Folkestone Central, Dover Priory, Dover Western Docks". Whilst these are all stations in Kent accessible from London it would not have been (and still is not) possible to take a single train from London to Dover via this route. Although there was once a line between Canterbury and Folkestone it actually ran from Canterbury West via South Canterbury on the Elham Valley Line, but this was pulled up in the mid 1950s and trains did not run direct from London to Dover via this line. Additionally trains from London via Ashford to Dover have always split at Ashford, usually into 'front 4 to Folkestone, rear 4 to Canterbury West' (not Canterbury East) - Ashford actually being the first of the stations listed on the announcement and being the last on the shared portion of the journey. Depending on which London station Ducky is supposed to be in (and sadly even small UK stations look nothing like the one portrayed in this scene, never mind a major station which would have been the starting point of Ducky's journey!) the train may also have called at additional London stations - for example the start of the line via Ashford would have been Charing Cross, the next station being Waterloo East, followed by London Bridge after which the train would call at Sevenoaks, Tonbridge, Paddock Wood and Ashford then Canterbury West OR Folkestone Central and finally to Dover. Alternatively, if the train was going via Canterbury East then the London station would have to be Victoria and the train would be calling at Rochester, Chatham, Gillingham, Sittingborne, Faversham, Canterbury East, Dover Priory. And finally, although in its later years the station at Dover docks was indeed called Dover Western Docks, it was only named this in 1979 and prior to this was called Dover Marine. If Ducky was travelling via Folkestone there is also just as much chance that Ducky would have been travelling to Folkestone Harbour on the boat train as continuing to Dover.

I took the Victoria line, for those of you (almost certainly British) who are interested in it.

"All Cops Are Bastards" but it turns out moronic leftists need the bastards in their corner

"Squiggly Line Guy" shows more than a few examples of leftists, particularly of the Viro Fascist variety, who can't get enough of the cops:

Year after year, these same Leftists in Seattle who have promoted the ACAB phrase, have also voted for tougher gun laws. Every year like clockwork they cry,” we have to do something,” —as if they didn’t just do that the year before, and the year before. Banning streamlined private sales, enacting Red Flag Laws, and scapegoating the mentally ill who generally aren’t all that violent to begin with, Leftists love police enforcement.

In Snohomish County in Washington State, one county north of Seattle’s King County, Leftists have started a recall effort against Sheriff Adam Fortney, who refused to enforce the closing of businesses. They’re upset that police weren’t using heavy hands. These are also the same people who turned in businesses and neighbors to the state’s snitch site, which eventually was made public.

This week Washington’s Governor Jay Inslee issued an emergency directive requiring the use of masks in public in situations where six feet of social distancing cannot be maintained. Washington’s ACAB Leftists applauded this, which made non compliance a misdemeanor offense. To be enforced by police.

And the catch-all ending for almost every article these days:

If it weren’t for double standards, the Left wouldn’t have standards at all

Dominion Day 2020

As Mark Steyn noted on his Monday audio show (which featured a parody of Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah), since "Canada Day" is now a scary racist and colonial holiday we might as well back to the original name (which, you probably note, I've been doing for years).

So indeed, it's now Dominion Day in the post-post-modern world where everything offends everybody. So fly your Red Ensign and loudly sing "The Maple Leaf Forever" this Dominion Day.

In days of yore, from Britain's shore,

Wolfe, the dauntless hero came,

And planted firm Britannia's flag,

On Canada's fair domain.

Here may it wave, our boast, our pride,

And joined in love together,

The thistle, shamrock, rose entwine

The Maple Leaf forever!

The Maple Leaf, our emblem dear,

The Maple Leaf forever!

God save our Queen, and Heaven bless,

The Maple Leaf forever!

At Queenston Heights and Lundy's Lane,

Our brave fathers, side by side,

For freedom, homes, and loved ones dear,

Firmly stood and nobly died;

And those dear rights which they maintained,

We swear to yield them never!

Our watchword evermore shall be,

The Maple Leaf forever!

Our fair Dominion now extends

From Cape Race to Nootka Sound;

May peace forever be our lot,

And plenteous store abound:

And may those ties of love be ours

Which discord cannot sever,

And flourish green o'er freedom's home

The Maple Leaf forever!

On merry England's far famed land

May kind heaven sweetly smile,

God bless old Scotland evermore

and Ireland's Em'rald Isle!

And swell the song both loud and long

Till rocks and forest quiver!

God save our Queen and Heaven bless

The Maple Leaf forever!

And yes, strangely enough it's hard to find any good recordings of "The Maple Leaf Forever". It literally doesn't seem to have been recorded in the digital age. Here's the Mormon Tabernacle Choir: