You can't go anywhere anymore where there are people with loud car stereos on Canada Day without hearing this song, Classified's 2009 hit "Oh... Canada"
The funniest parts of the song, to my ears at least, are the outright blatant errors. First off, let's check the lyrics to see how he attacks people who have stereotypical views of Canadians:
I've been around the globe and heard the confusion
honestly a lot of y'all are ignorant and stupid
yes, we have microwaves, tvs and cell phones
unintelligent fuck we invented the telephone
So far, so good, right? Yeah, well this is pretty much where things go off the deep end.
we made Yahtzee the light bulb, hockeyThe reference to the lightbulb is referring to Henry Woodward, who filed a patent for a lightbulb which Thomas Edison later bought out. The problem, of course, is that the lightbulb wasn't invented by Woodward. Edison bought out their ideas, rejected it in favour of his better design, and they were kind of a godfather to the idea, like Bela Lugosi as a godfather to the idea of the modern zombie movie. Okay, so let's let this guy have his line.
and bred the greatest player's Gretzky to Crosby
our national mascot's a damn beaverOkay, so the beaver is Canada's national animal, but I suppose mascot isn't...well, totally inaccurate. The Hell's Angels, on the other hand, were formed in California. I guess it's a political jurisdiction of 35 million people that starts with a "Ca", but really, that's a pretty laughable thing to try to claim. The early history of the Hell's Angles is tied with the California counter-culture of the post-WWII era. Even the term "Hell's Angels" is tied directly with the Yankees.
O Canada we love our beaver
home of Hell's Angels the RCMP
home of Gordon Lightfoot and SCTV
our health care system y'all know its freeOkay, when I heard this one I actually started laughing. Do you know what aspect of healthcare is not 'free' (included in universal coverage) and must be paid for privately? That's right...dental care.
keep our girls banging with a full mouth of teeth
But wait, let's go further back before he talked about his global travels!
And if it ain't that, it's either "dude, " "eh, " or "guy"Er, no we don't. Though a poll from yesterday does show people in favour of decriminalizing small amounts of the drug the law is very clear that marijuana, regardless of the dosage, is not legal in Canada.
Canadaka eh, yeah we considerate people
And smokin marijuana, we consider it legal
Rap aficionados concerned with people's ignorance of a foreign country should perhaps ask why they know so little about it as a resident.