2007-03-02

Thoughts about Ryan Smyth Chris Pronger. Er, what?

No, you didn't read that incorrectly, there are still some Chris Pronger tidbits that need to be addressed.

First, somebody one-upped me in my characterization of Pronger on this website, by suggesting the Chris Pronger Memorial Red Light District. Ha!

On a second note, there's a rumour going around, to which we shall have to see, which states that though Anaheim has neither Christie Chorley nor Dantes waitresses, Pronger has still managed to diddle in the puck bunny pool, and as a result Mrs. Lauren Pronger (nee Walton) has initiated divorce proceedings. If true, this means that...drumroll please...Chris Pronger could have remained an Oiler, as the entire reason of his leaving (slighted wife) still happened after his departure. 20/20 hindsight, geesh.

Third, somebody was telling me yesterday that, again according to rumour, contract talks were only part of the reason that Paul Coffey and the Edmonton Oilers parted ways in 1987. Apparently there were stories circulating that Coffey had an Oiltown honey on the side, and that he needed to go elsewhere, coinciding happily with plans for a new contract.
Now remember that this sounds awfully familiar, as that's the reason we (probably) lost Pronger. Also bear in mind that Mike Comrie's departure was strongly rumoured to be in whole or in part due to his bonking Tommy Salo's wife. Salo's quick and sudden descent from greatness is also likely more from his woman's indiscretions as opposed to the Belarus Incident.
My basic point here is that the Oilers have lost a lot of great players due to women over the years [don't forget about Gretzky's wife wanting to become an actress, hence his move to L.A. -- on second thought, you can forget it, since the only acting Janet Jones has ever done has been to prosecuters asking about Rick Tocket -ed]. With the Oilers having such rotten luck on the subject of players and their puckbunny wives, I can only assume that we will be the first team to enthusiastically support pillow biting players in the NHL.

"Hey, some players admitted they're homos? We'll take 'em all!"

Finally, on some mostly non-Pronger related Oilers thoughts, Georges Laraque has pissed off a few Oiler fans (and won a few others over) by noting how many concussions the Oilers have received this season. The implication, of course, is that without their big enforcer other players are taking liberties with the talent. (This argument has been made by hockey commentators as well, I'm not singling out Georges himself). However, could not an equally valid argument for all the injuries be the reminder that until last week, MAB was still on the team?

Bonus faggots in hockey note: The article linked to above contains this quote: "Where heterosexual athletes can incorporate their girlfriends or wives into certain team functions, Aaron has none of those freedoms. He sneaks guys into his hotel room when on the road (he is in an open relationship)". Politically, I will note this is yet another example of how poofters are not "just like everybody else except for how they love", because it reasserts the well-known fact that uranists are incapable of monogamous relationships. Hockey-wise, this open relationship stuff is just what the Salos and Prongers of the league need!

1 comments:

Raging Ranter said...

Who knows if any of that stuff is true or not? We'll never know for sure. Reminds me though, of one story that was confirmed way back when.

RW Gary Leeman, then of the Toronto Maple Leafs, started doinking defenseman Al Iafrate's wife, almost immediately after they separated. Al Iafrate felt that it happened just a little too soon after the separation, and it caused considerable dissension in the Leafs dressing room back in the day.